How to give feedback on a text

On Friday, you will get an essay from someone in another class. You are going to give feedback. To be able to do that, please watch the film. Then take a look at the phrases below the film. Those phrases can help you giving the feedback.
1. Watch the film
2. Follow the different steps of the film and write your comments, to the right, in the margin.
3. Think about how the text can be improved. Use the phrases from Two stars and wish and write your comments at the end of the essay.
4. Hand in your feedback to your teacher.
5. When you get your own text back, you need to go through the comments and re-write your text at home.
6. If you re-write your text on the computer, remember to share the text with your teacher.

(LGR 11, Kunskapskrav för A år 9: För att förtydliga och variera sin kommunikation kan eleven bearbeta och göra välgrundade förbättringar av egna framställningar)





Two Stars and a Wish
STARS

Variation and vocabulary 

 Your language is varied.
 You vary your language well.
 Your vocabulary is very varied.
 Your language felt very much alive.
 You have a varied language and don’t repeat yourself.

 Clarity and coherence 

 Your text has good flow.
 It’s easy to understand your text.
The content of your text was clear with good details.
 The content was very clear.
 Your text has a clear line of argument.
 There was a clear line of argument in your text, making it easy to understand.
 Your text is coherent and clear.
 You reason with good arguments to support your point.

 Adaption

 Your writing is well adapted to your theme.
 You adapt your language to different genres.
You adapt your text to the receiver and situation.

 Grammar and spelling

 Good sentence structure and descriptions.
 You write with good grammar.

 WISHES

 Variation and vocabulary

 You could vary your vocabulary more.
 You could use more difficult words and sentences.
 Try to read more difficult text to learn how to write like that.
 You need to expand your vocabulary.
 Try to make your language come alive more.

 Clarity and coherence

 Your text could have better flow.
 You could develop your reasoning more.
 Try to make your text more coherent.  
Next time you write a text, make sure it has a clear line of argument.  
You can work with clarifying your text
.
 Adaption
 You could adapt your language more to your theme.
 You can think about adapting your text to the receiver and situation.
You should try to adapt the language to your genre.
You could adapt your language more to the purpose

 Grammar and spelling 

 You can improve the grammar in your text.
 You need to improve the sentence structure.
 There are some spelling mistakes, read through your text once more to find them.
 Think about what tense you use (verbs).

(The phrases are made by Mia Smith and her students)

 Sara